Mom's Day

posted by Jory on Sunday, May 10, 2009
I thought that, in honor of Mom's Day today, I'd tell you a bit about the woman who reared me (and lived to tell about it). This is how awesome my mom is.

  • For my eighth birthday, I begged for a Pocahontas cake. I thought it would be so cool. My mom, however, had alterior plans. Plans which, quite frankly, blew the socks off my Pocahontas plans. When my cake arrived at my birthday party and was set down in front of me, I was surprised to see not Pocahontas, but my own smiling face staring up at me. It was seriously the coolest cake ever, and everyone said so. But I remember being really angry, and possibly throwing a bit of a fit because I wanted Pocahontas. I still feel bad about that to this day.
  • When I was 15, my friend decided to let me try and drive his Acura which was a stick shift. We drove around the neighborhood, all the while my friend was shifting for me and yelling clutch since I didn't know what I was supposed to be doing. We pulled up to a stop sign and I did something wrong and the car started bouncing up and down. A cop was behind us and decided to follow us back to my driveway. He got out of his squad car and I stopped the Acura and started to get out. I didn't realize that there wasn't a parking gear like on an automatic transmission, so the car started rolling backwards. My mom walked out the front door just as the cop turned on his lights. We got a warning from the cop, and my mom gave me the "You're in big trouble, young lady," but once we got inside and shut the door she started cracking up.
  • She is always telling me to be aware of "bad guys."
  • She totally talked back to this grumpy know-it-all that I used to work with and she put him in his place.
  • I used "Perm For A Day" on my hair once, and she told me my head looked like a Furby.
  • Like all good mom's, she encouraged me to study some sort of medicine. She told me that doctor's and nurses would always find work. And though this was never an area I actually wanted to pursue, I knew she was looking out for my best interests. And of course, she has always been supportive of my writing and has told me (lied, I'm sure) that I'm great at it.
  • She taught me how to sew when I was little and helped me make "friendship pillows."
  • She made me a gorgeous prom dress. And a beautiful black cocktail dress.
  • She laughs at herself.
  • Despite the fact that I used to sleepwalk a lot and, in fact, once dove on her in my sleep, she still wants me to sleep with her when I visit. (And her bed is like sleeping on a cloud.)
  • She laughs at me. Like the time I fell down the stairs. She held it in until she knew I was okay, then she showed no mercy.
  • She says things like, "I don't think Jesus needs a house."
  • She used to call in sick for me so I could have "mental health days" in high school. (Then again, I was such a good kid I deserved it. Ha ha.)
Anyways, my mom is awesome. Love you mom. Thanks for birthing me. I pretty much appreciate it. And you got a pretty good end of the bargain too, if I do say so myself.

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