Thinking About My Friend

posted by Jory on Tuesday, June 11, 2013

I've been thinking a lot about a friend of mine. One of my best friends, actually, who moved away a few years ago and I miss terribly. She reads this blog, occasionally, so she will probably be embarrassed that I talked about her, thus I'm not going to name her. But really, she is one of the best people I know.

I was reading another blog post earlier this morning about being a nice person - being nice to everyone and focusing on whatever aspect of them is good. As the author of this particular blog post was writing about how to be non-judgmental, I was sitting there thinking how hypocritical she was based on some other things I've read by her. Then it occurred to me that by thinking these things about her I was being judgmental and hypocritical, myself. And then I realized how many more times only today I've been judgmental, thanks in no small part, to Facebook. Don't worry, I'm not going off on a rant about Facebook, but I do find it interesting how it tends to bring out the worst in me.

So, anyway, I was reading this post and thinking that the only person I know that models this non-judgmental, non-hypocritical temperament is my friend who, since moving away, now has less of a direct influence on me since we only see each other a few times a year and most of that time is spent catching up.

I think I was legitimately a better person before she moved away because she has a way of loving everybody that just rubs off on you. She doesn't gossip, she doesn't fault other people of their mistakes (or if she does, she keeps it to herself), and most of all, she doesn't force or suggest her opinion of someone to cloud another persons mind. She's perfectly happy to make up her mind about someone and let others make up their own minds.

If you asked her, she would say all of this is an overestimation, because she also humble.

I have a lot to learn from my friend. I consider myself a good person, but when I think about how often I judge people and how tightly I hold on to grudges I realize that I could use a lot more grace in my life. I wish it came naturally to me, but it's obviously something I need to work on.

Add it to the list.



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